Dr. J. Derek McNeil, president of The Seattle School of Theology & Psychology and Cathy Lorezel, Co-founder of The Allender Center join Dan and Rachael for a special anniversary episode. They share some beginning behind-the scenes stories of how The Allender Center was birthed and what drives us to stay in this work in the future.

This week, Dan and Rachael discuss how hiding keeps us from being authentic. Sometimes hiding can be an outright refusal to let others see, and other times, our hiding can be harder to notice. In the episode, Dan and Rachael talk about the ways we hide, how to let others know and see us more, and the freedom that comes with that kind of authenticity.

This week, Dan and Rachel discuss sabotage and its connection to self contempt, which has capacity to ruin communities and lives.

This week, Dan and Rachael discuss scapegoating as a kind of rage that moves into the dehumanization of others. Stemming from contempt and judgement, the topic of scapegoating also brings up the experiences of projection and envy. As they ponder these categories, the ask the question: How do we become aware of our own propensity towards scapegoating and our use of it to escape what we don't want to have to see and own in our own hearts?

What keeps us from engaging well with one another? 

For the next few weeks on the podcast, Dan and Rachael are going to be debating four categories that prevent us from connecting well, beginning with rage. In a time when people’s margins and capacity are thinner than ever, how do we differentiate between rage and anger and how we can attend to our bodies and wellbeing in the midst of someone’s rage?

When Cyndi Mesmer agreed to participate in the very first Training Certificate program in 2011 (now Certificate in Narrative Focused Trauma Care Level I), she anticipated a laid-back conference where she would gather a few insights and make small talk with other attendees. 

Instead, what she and fellow facilitator Scott Gibson encountered would change the course of their lives, relationships, and therapeutic practices. So today on the podcast, as we continue to celebrate 10 years of The Allender Center, Dan and Rachael engage Cyndi and Scott in conversation about how they first came to be involved with The Allender Center and why they’ve remained, how engaging their own stories and the stories of others impact their practices and relationships, and so much more. 

Today on the podcast, Dan and Rachael finish a conversation on spiritual and sexual abuse by discussing the impact of these types of abuse and ways we can begin to find healing. They acknowledge that at times it can be difficult to distinguish between the two, determine which came first, or how they affect the other, which is to be expected—these abuses are complex and nuanced. As you listen to the episode, can you begin to wonder: How can you begin to heal, to enter your story and honor your body without causing more harm to yourself?

In this episode, Dan and Rachael begin to talk about the connections between sexual and spiritual abuse. Sexual abuse is also spiritual abuse, but not all spiritual abuse involves clear sexual abuse. They discuss the nuances, definitions, and processes of these two types of abuse and the intimate connection between our bodies as image-bearers of our Creator and the violation that occurs when someone commits abuse against another. We enter into this episode knowing the topics of spiritual and sexual abuse carry a certain kind of heaviness for many of our listeners. Particularly in this season, please tend kindly to your body and know that you can return to listen another time if this is not right for you today.

What goes into the creation of a book? In this special episode, we take a deep dive into the making of Dr. Dan Allender and Cathy Loerzel’s new release, Redeeming Heartache: How Past Suffering Reveals True Calling. Special guest host Dr. J. Derek McNeil, President & Provost of The Seattle School, Dan, and Cathy discuss how the idea for the book came to be, the process and challenges of writing a book together, particularly in the midst of COVID, and the prophetic nature of the content. As they close the conversation, Derek poses a poignant question to Dan and Cathy—and to us all: What does it mean to celebrate our own stories?

No story is without its share of joy, anticipation, trials, and victories, and the same can be said about the founding of The Allender Center. This year we are celebrating 10 years as a center and place where people have found healing from trauma. It has been an immense honor to be able to hear and walk with you through your stories of harm into restoration. Today, Dan and Rachael share memories and tales with Becky Allender and Jeanette White, Interim Senior Director, both former guests of the podcast and founding members of The Allender Center. You’ll get to hear true behind-the-scenes stories of how The Allender Center came to be and what drives them to continue this work today.