How can we become more capable of repairing our relationships with ourselves, others, and with God?

In this episode, Dan and Rachael dive into the concept of repair in both personal and larger societal contexts.

They stress the importance of humility in our repair process, introducing the concept of "epistemic humility" as a way to express love by making space for others. It’s a curious approach that acknowledges the limitations of our perspective, which is shaped by our unique experiences.

The conversation becomes personal as they reflect on a past publication that may have caused harm and explore how these experiences can be used for growth and repair.

By practicing repair with justice, mercy, and humility (Micah 6:8) in our day-to-day personal relationships, we can also begin to address broader societal issues with a similar approach. Rachael closes out this episode with this reminder: “Repair is a core part of what it means to love and be loved.”

This episode contains brief explicit language that may be offensive to some listeners; discretion is advised.

We’re so pleased to be joined by therapist and author Aundi Kolber, known for her acclaimed works "Try Softer" and, most recently, "Strong Like Water."

As a licensed professional counselor specializing in trauma- and body-centered therapies, Aundi's expertise is deeply informed by her personal journey of healing from complex childhood trauma. 

Aundi candidly shares her personal journey of healing, from confronting the profound extent of her past trauma and discovering healing methods that nurture a sense of safety, self-care, and self-compassion.

She shares: “Part of my own journey, and I think my writing, I hope, I pray, that the trajectory of my writing is about that to live into these values actually has required me to get softer so I could get stronger.”

We invite you to join Dan, Rachael, and Aundi on this week’s episode of the Allender Center Podcast.

This episode contains brief explicit language that may be offensive to some listeners; discretion is advised.

When it comes to telling the truth, we grapple with a fundamental tension— we’re living in a fallen world as imperfect beings, yet we also recognize and long for the beauty of truth.

When it comes to relationships, especially close ones, this tension can become even more complex. The fear of potential consequences often competes with our desire to be honest and authentic.

Navigating this path can be tricky. There's a fine line between being authentic and being cruel. What's needed is a generous spirit, an understanding of how much truth we can bear, and kindness.

Dan closes the episode with the gentle reminder: “And this is why I keep coming back to Jesus being able to say, I am the way and the truth and the life. And if I'm intending to follow, to be aligned and alive and molded, then I want that way. I want that truth. I want that life. And I'm going to find it not in myself, not in you, but in him, and therefore in me, and you and us. And it just holds the tension that what we dream we will never get, but what we dream we will become.”

Ever wondered why we sometimes keep the truth hidden, even from those we love most? Today, we’re exploring the intricacies of truth and deceit with questions like:

Why do we resort to little white lies?

What drives us to withhold the truth?

Is keeping a secret ever an act of love?

And how do we navigate the weight of truth when it feels unbearable?

The humbling reality is that none of us can handle the unfiltered truth all the time and we all have the capacity for deception.

How does recognizing our inability to bear the full truth serve us? How can we move toward greater honesty and authenticity, both within ourselves and in our relationships with others?

Join Dan and Rachael as they navigate the depths of truth, deception, and the hope that emerges from our quest for more honesty and love.